That title might not seem like a particularly-dramatic statement, but I think it’s worth mentioning. I say this especially because of the sorts of things I’ve heard lately. Some of them, I suppose, not so much lately as just having heard them in general.
Men make fun of their wives, complain about them, and say all kinds of things. I don’t care to make a lot of specific examples, because I’m not trying to call anyone out right now. Just to give you a sense of what’s got me going, though …
- This past week, I heard a radio host talking about how annoying his wife is when she’s hinting about a gift that she wants.
- A married man that I know answered the question, “What should you do if you’re thinking about marriage?” with “Run away fast.”
And then, of course, there are such jokes as:
- My wife and I lived happily for 20 years. Then we met and got married.
- I haven’t spoken to my wife in 5 years. I don’t want to interrupt her while she’s talking.
Ha, ha … Oh, so funny. (Make sure to reread that in a deadpan if you didn’t get that as it was intended.)
Sadly, Christian men do this all the time. How am I supposed to view my wife?
I’m supposed to love her. Paul told the Ephesians, in fact, that I’m supposed to love her “just as Christ loved the church” (Ephesians 5:25). He went on to say that I should love her as I love my own body (Ephesians 5:28).
Do I sit around with “the guys” complaining about what a loser I am? About what a jerk I am?
Of course not. Therefore, if I’m loving my wife the way Paul told me to, I should not be doing that to my wife, either.
Christ loved the Church, and showed His love by going out into difficult and often-unpleasant situations for us. He sought out sinners to be helped and then suffered a brutal death. That, by the way, is not the same as sitting on the couch watching TV and telling one’s wife to bring another beer.
So, I’ve decided to take this opportunity to say a few things about how wonderful my wife is.
For one thing, she is rarely less than the smartest person in the room. She has an MS in Mathematics. She enjoys topology. She teaches algebra, trigonometry, and calculus at an emotional-growth boarding school. That means that nearly all of her students are the problem students from other schools. She’s also the math department head, she was the acting faculty head over the summer, and she’s also an academic advisor.
My wife earns the money that supports our family. My wife is a wonderful, caring, and loving person. My wife also enjoys some of the same types of books and shows that I do. That includes science fiction and fantasy. (She knows the Lord of the Rings series better than I ever will. The night we spent during a power outage playing the LOTR edition of Trivial Pursuit by oil lamp is … well, … a humbling story. But a good one.)
I don’t feel the need to join in with people who complain about their “ball and chain.” As Paul Overstreet sang, “Love don’t feel like a ball and chain to me/When I’m close to [her] my heart is wild and free.”
By the way, I was pleased to see the e-mail sig from a fellow blogger, who ends every e-mail with the note “My wife is my best friend.” That’s a guy who gets it. Part of me saw that and thought, “Wow, I should have done that.”
As our relationship was starting, a friend of mine asked me, “Has it occured to you that God put you two together deliberately? By the way, if He did, that means He loves you very much.” I can’t argue with that.
So, Zeta, if you’re reading this … I love you.
To anyone else … You know what? I love my wife. Very much.